My Dorky Dad Needs a New Shirt

Typically, the parents’ role is to take care of the children. They ensure that you have food in your belly. That you get to school on time. A parent makes sure that you do your homework and that you’re dressed properly. However, in extreme cases, the child must take care of the parent. Mine is one of those extreme cases and I have decided that it is time for me to step in.

Because he’s already a grown-up, my dad knows how to handle most of the basics. He makes his own food and even makes some for me some times. He gets up everyday and goes to work without having to be waked up. No one has to remind him to do his homework, which I guess turns into paying the bills when you get old. But, he still hasn’t mastered the ‘dressing properly’ part of adulthood. Sure, he wears a suit to work and he looks pretty okay most of the time. When he gets home, he puts on his ‘casual clothes’. This is where it gets ugly.

The shirt, that is. He puts on his cool Dad shirt. Yikes. He has to think it’s cool or else he wouldn’t wear it as often as he does. The truth is, it’s the most hideous piece of clothing I, or anyone else, have ever seen. She’d never admit it, but even my mom thinks it’s awful. So I’ve decided that there needs to be an intervention and it’s up to me to save my dad from himself and his horrible taste. I’ve got to be sneaky about it, though. The shirt can’t just disappear or he’ll catch on and he might get his feelings hurt. What I’ll do is get him a new, much cooler shirt.

I’m even going to take it one step further. I’ll make him a personalized shirt just for him from little ole’ me. That way, it will automatically be way cooler than anything he has in his closet. And, he’ll be obligated to wear it as often as possible. That’s what parents do, right? They use, in any way possible, any and all gifts given to them by their children. I’m going to use his unconditional parental love against him. It’s for his own good.

So, kids, remember, you do not have to accept your parents’ embarrassing wardrobe choices. You do have options. In fact, your options are limited only by your imagination when you choose the fool proof route of having an original shirt designed for your stylistically challenged mom or dad. My only suggestion is that you not design the shirt to read “Fashion Victim.” I mean, you’re trying to help them overcome their challenges in the wardrobe department, not announce them to the world. However, if a shirt that says “Fashion Victim” would be a step up from their previous choice, I guess you can’t lose. Whatever you do, act now. Gift your dorky mom or dad with a cool new shirt designed by you. They’ll thank you for it one day.

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